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Women

Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

She wanted a puppy. But I didn't want a puppy. So we compromised and got a puppy.

Never laugh at your girlfriends choices... your one of them.

My girlfriend was complaining last night that I never listen to her. Or something like that...

A woman will dress up when she goes shopping, 
empties the garbage, answers the phone, 
waters the plants, gets the mail and read a book. 

A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

Never argue with a woman when 

she's tired
or 
she's rested.

A woman's age is harder to get 
than the President's phone number.

LOVE IS BLIND

Marrying a woman on the other hand is a 

"Real Eye Opener".

There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman - 

Before Marriage 
and 
After Marriage.

Q: Which book do women like the most? 
A: “Their husband’s checkbook!”

Never tell a woman that her place is in the kitchen. That's where the knives are kept.

What do women and police cars have in common? 

They both make a lot of noise to let you know they are coming.

Women always have the last word in an argument. Anything a man adds after that is the beginning of a new argument.

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