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Married Life

In a drug store: 
- Sorry, that is impossible. We sell potassium cyanide only with prescription. Just a photo of your mother-in-law is not enough!

Before marriage, a man will lie awake 
all night thinking about something you say. 

After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.

Marriage is when a man and woman 
become as one; 

the trouble starts when they 
try to decide which one.

Marriages are made in heaven. 
But so again, are thunder and lightning.

It is difficult to understand GOD. 
He makes such beautiful things as women 
and then he turns them into Wives !

If you are married please ignore this msg, 
for everyone else: 

Happy Independence Day

Different Phases of a man:
After engagement: Superman
After Marriage: Gentleman
After 10 years: Watchman
After 20 years: Doberman

Why do Bride & Groom exchange varmaala during wedding ?
To tell each other affectionately... Sweetheart U R Dead !

There is only one perfect child 
in the world and every mother has it.

There is only one perfect wife 
in the world and every neighbour has it

Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated?
Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.

Why do you want to divorce your wife?
She smokes in bed!

Well,that`s not a reason for divorce.
Yes,but also she likes to use my ear as an ashtray!

Husband and wife are sitting on the beach.
Wife asking husband:
– What do you like more in me : my body or tan?
– Your sense of humor, – husband responded.

Wife saying to a husband :
– I `ll go to a neighbor for a minute and you stir soup every 10 minutes.

Wife saying to a husband :
– Life is so boring,I want to do something unusual,something that I never did before.
– Ok, – husband reacted, – you can iron my shirt

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