Expressify - Ecards,Jokes, SMS,Stories,Facts And Tips Wallpaper and more...

Home ECards Wallpaper Jokes SMS Facts And Tips Stories Profile Pictures

Husband n Wife

Two Wise Advises for Married People

Never laugh at your wife's choices...
(You are one of them...)

Never be Proud of Your Choices...
(Your Wife is one of them...)

A Question:

If you are Married to one of the  Twin Sisters,
How Would You Recognize Your Wife?
The Answer:
"Why Should I?"

Question: If your wife is shouting, at the front door, and your dog is barking, at the back door, who do you let in first?
Answer: The dog, of course. At least he'll shut up after you let him in...

The relationship between
Husband and wife is very psychological.
One is psycho and the other is logical.

Wife: What's that beeping?
Me: That's my seat belt alarm.
Wife: How can you ignore something so annoying?
Me: Huh?

Wife comes back, from very expensive VIP hairdressing salon, and asks husband :
- Honey,how do you like, my new hairstyle?
Husband looked at wife and says : - Don`t worry it`ll grow back fast !!!

The two most difficult things to achieve are:
1. To plant someone’s money in your pocket!
2. To plant your idea in someone’s head!!
The one who succeeds in both is ....a Wife!!                                                                                  and the one who fails in both is a Husband!!

Life is great when you have...
American salary, German car, Chinese food and Indian wife!
But
Life is Hell when you have...
American wife, German food, Chinese car and Indian salary!!!

A doctor implanted a new ear to a patient.
Man after the surgery; what you did to me !!! you gave me a woman’s ear!!!.
Doctor : It makes no difference; both are the same!
Man: No!! It does, Now i can hear everything but absolutely understand nothing.

After ten years of marriage, the wife asks her husband: 
- Honey, are you by nature a winner or a loser? 
- Honey, over the years I realized that I am the victim …

My wife decided to lose weight.
She started going to the fitness classes,pool and singing lessons.
You probably want to ask : ”Why the singing lessons?”
She just want to make herself, as busy as possible,so she doesn`t have a lot of time to eat.

Husband and wife lost each other in a big store.
So husband asking, very cute salesperson: - Please,can you smile to me?
- Why?
- If you do,my wife will appear here in a second.

What’s the difference between a Wife and a terrorist??
You can negotiate with a terrorist.

Husband to a newly wed wife!
I could go to the end of the world for you
Wife:Thanks,but promise me
you will stay there for the rest of your life.

Select Your Preferred Language