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Married Life

I am getting married next month….
There's small party and
only few people will be invited……
don't bring any gift…..
just bring someone who'll marry me.

Some people ask the secret
of our long marriage.
We take time to go to a restaurant
two times a week.
A little candlelight dinner, soft music
and dancing.
She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.

What's the difference between love and marriage?
Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock.

A guy asks his friend:
- Have you talked to the hero, who has saved your mother-in-law from drowning in the river?
- Yes I did. He came and apologized.

Life Time tip for married couples:
Try To Present Yourself That
You Are HAPPY,

Slowly It Becomes
Your Habit
&
Finally It Becomes
Your Character.

My wife wants to lose some weight,so she is doing a lot of horse riding.
- And,what are the results?
- From one week horse lost 20 pounds.

Wife argues with husband:
- You can`t choose what car to buy almost for five months!!! 
And when we start dating,
you proposed to me after just one week!

Darling,you can`t compare this kind of things. 
Choosing the car – it is very important matter!!!

Wife saying to her husband :
– Honey,is it true that my blue eyes look like a sky?
– Yes. – husband replied
– And my lips red,like roses?
– Sure.
– Oh,I like it so much,when you say such beautiful words to me.

First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" 

Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

Husband- Hi baby! 
Was missing you so I called.. 

Wife: Oh. What about the big fight, we had 10 mins ago? 
You are not angry? 

Husband: Oh Sh!t! I dialed home again.

A good marriage would be 
between a blind wife and 
a deaf husband.

A husband once complained:
Dear Google,
Please stop behaving like my wife…
Will you please allow me to complete
the whole sentence before you start…..?

My wife and I always compromise; 
I admit that I'm wrong and 
she agrees with me.

There was a man who said, 
I never knew what happiness
was until I got married.... 
and then it was too late!

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